Talk:Press releases/Cancer Research UK: Difference between revisions
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The first draft is great, but I think it was a bit too wordy and the sentences a bit too long, so I've tried to address that. I don't want to put words in Mike's mouth, so I'm not going to edit his quote, but the only thing I'd tweak about it is "one of the largest websites on the internet". I'm wary of merely saying that there's a lot of stuff: I feel it could be more upbeat. How about "the largest collection of knowledge ever assembled by human beings"? or "Wikipedia provides free information about millions of topics, and is used by..."? Am I on the right track here? [[User:MartinPoulter|MartinPoulter]] 11:01, 24 March 2011 (UTC) | The first draft is great, but I think it was a bit too wordy and the sentences a bit too long, so I've tried to address that. I don't want to put words in Mike's mouth, so I'm not going to edit his quote, but the only thing I'd tweak about it is "one of the largest websites on the internet". I'm wary of merely saying that there's a lot of stuff: I feel it could be more upbeat. How about "the largest collection of knowledge ever assembled by human beings"? or "Wikipedia provides free information about millions of topics, and is used by..."? Am I on the right track here? [[User:MartinPoulter|MartinPoulter]] 11:01, 24 March 2011 (UTC) | ||
: Thanks, I've used a slightly modified version of the second suggestion. I'm not so sure about the first, as it all depends on how you define 'collection' - is the entire National Archives or the British Library a collection? If so, that's probably larger than Wikipedia (for now...). [[User:Mike Peel|Mike Peel]] 11:46, 26 March 2011 (UTC) | |||
Latest revision as of 12:46, 26 March 2011
The first draft is great, but I think it was a bit too wordy and the sentences a bit too long, so I've tried to address that. I don't want to put words in Mike's mouth, so I'm not going to edit his quote, but the only thing I'd tweak about it is "one of the largest websites on the internet". I'm wary of merely saying that there's a lot of stuff: I feel it could be more upbeat. How about "the largest collection of knowledge ever assembled by human beings"? or "Wikipedia provides free information about millions of topics, and is used by..."? Am I on the right track here? MartinPoulter 11:01, 24 March 2011 (UTC)
- Thanks, I've used a slightly modified version of the second suggestion. I'm not so sure about the first, as it all depends on how you define 'collection' - is the entire National Archives or the British Library a collection? If so, that's probably larger than Wikipedia (for now...). Mike Peel 11:46, 26 March 2011 (UTC)